Sunday, June 29, 2008
So I've finally come to the point where I have everything I need. I'm anxiously waiting for my long awaited Treesje Asher to arrive. I really hope it gets here safe and sound. It's been a long 7 months obsessing over thousands of ugly bags online.
Now the sad thing is this... I'm bored and I'm searching online for more. For more things I don't need. I don't need anything. I have everything I need now. The conquest is over, yet these meaningless material things will never give me satisfaction. I see this pattern over and over again in this earthly world. With relationships, with clothes, with cars, with jobs. And it all boils down to that same truth that nothing in this world will make you happy. Happiness comes from within and it's inside everyone. It's up to you to unlock this internal satisfaction and realize that you don't need anything. That everything material just disappears anyways.
And so I state here my gratitude for what I have at this present moment. A job where I have flexibility, can exercise creativity, wear what I want, and is 5 minutes away from home. I drive a BMW convertible that's compact enough during parallel parking madness. I have no idea how little me ended up with Zmurf - it's a love-hate relationship with that car.
I live by the beach. I can walk out and relax and enjoy the sand and sunshine whenever I want. Living by the beach makes me not want to go anywhere else. I find myself not wanting to drive or visit any other places because I'm content where I'm located. I have a boyfriend, who through ups and downs, we still stick strong and our love fights through the storm of everyday unconsciousness. He is beautiful and I am blessed. Waking up everyday beside someone you love is like finding lost treasure. And lastly, I can dance like a maniac. My soul is able to move in ways I can't describe. I feel music and it penetrates my soul and makes it come to life. I love that feeling and the energy of "house" ;).
Anyways, that's me. That's me right now. I am happy and I'm satisfied. I don't need more stupid material things to chase after.